What’s the one time of year when people can use enough glitter to choke a horse and spend a ton of money on velvet ribbon? No, not gay Cousin Fred’s birthday party…Christmas! And wouldn’t you know it, today I got to go with my mom to a local florist, where in the grand tradition of the season, the place got the “Santa threw up on me…now what?” treatment. Every square inch of the store was covered in Christmas decorations, centerpieces, Christmas trees, parachuting Santas, even a mini tree made out of feathers. Yup, feathers.
I must say that my inner goblin was whispering things in my ear, and it was all I could do to hold in the smirks and snickers as women walked toward the counter with nutcrackers made of present boxes and candle arrangements with plastic poinsettias (did I spell that right?) tied to the bottom. Aack! The meaner version of myself wanted to scream, “You’re not really going to put that on the dining room table for all your relatives to see, are you?” But I kept my mouth shut, for my mother’s sake.
I will say this though: my mom has great taste. She gets her tree decorated by one of the guys at the shop every year, so she had everything picked out all ready and pulled from the shelves in advance. Granted, alone, some of the stuff she picks out looks like ugly on a stick – a glittery mass of twigs with some crystal berries attached – but when it all goes up on the tree and you turn on the lights, it looks great. So, for the ladies in the shop, maybe if they put it at just the right angle under good lighting, the sparkles will outshine that ugly plaid ribbon…
Here’s to a happy beginning to another holiday season!